Jury Research Project

Are you interested in participating in a Jury Research Project in Erie County, Pennsylvania?

Have you ever wondered how the jury process works? Have you participated in a jury before and would like to again? Have you never participated in a jury process and are curious? Would like to experience what it is like to be a juror and hear evidence from real disputes?

You need no qualifications or expertise other than the ability to listen to both sides of a dispute, and then make a fair decision. (You also have to be able to read and write without assistance.)

Virtually everyone who has participated in these projects reports them to be extremely interesting, enjoyable, and worthwhile.

We will pay you $20.00 for the 4-5 hour session. A light supper and refreshments will be served.

Please join us for this unusual evening. If you are interested, call me at 454-1100 any weekday between 9 a.m. and 5 p.m., and leave a contact number and a good time to reach you.

If you are interested, please call as available slots fill quickly.

Thanks. Laurie TeWinkle, January 22, 2009.

Knee Surgery?

Have you had knee surgery in Erie County, Pennsylvania in the past three years?

If so, I would like to hear from you. We are doing research regarding this surgery. Knee surgery includes knee replacement, knee arthoscopy and any repair to the knee joint or any ligaments.

If you would like to share this information, please respond to this blog, and provide the following information:

1. Date of surgery ( if multiple surgeries to the knee, list all dates)
2. Type of surgery ( if multiple surgeries, list all types)
3. Doctor ( if multiple doctors performed surgery on your knee joint, list all doctors)
4. Hospital (if multiple hospitals involved in surgeries, list all of them)
5. Any complications (list all complications with your knee)
6. Name, Address & Phone number, Email address
7. Age
8. Any other diseases?
9. Any prior injuries to the knee joint?

Thanks. Laurie TeWinkle, January 23, 2009.

Where are the Women?

Say No to Muffin Tops

Ladies – MUFFIN TOPS HANGING OVER

YOUR PANTS ARE NOT OK

First of all, what is a muffin top? Webster’s New Millennium Dictionary of English describes "muffin top" as a noun, with a definition of "flesh that falls over the waistband of a garment:". Other sources on the web (www.urbandictionary.com and www.doubletongued.org cite the origin of the term with Australian comediennes Kath and Kim, meaning when a woman wears a pair of tight jeans that makes her flab spill out over the waistband, like the top of a muffin sits over the edge of the paper case. Www.doubletongued.org indicates this word was nominated as a word of the year in 2006, but did not win. Most people have one of these, but not all people display theirs publicly.

In this article, it means that roll of fat around your stomach that cannot be confined by the garment currently covering you’re a--. They come in varying sizes and levels of disgust. Some are so disgusting, they would qualify the person for repeat felony status on the sentencing guidelines of your local criminal court, with a 20 to life sentence. They are illegal in all 50 states. Some can blind innocent on-lookers. However, there is no enforcement, as the funding for the Muffin Top Police was usurped on October 8, 2008. That is the same day Congress approved the "Treasury Capital Purchase Program", or as more affectionately called by the taxpayers, the day Congress gave $700MM of my money to the banks.

Next, how did this style come to existence? Research indicates it is re-emergence of the 60’s & 70’s style. It re-emerged in modern times to elongate the torso. If whatever you are doing creates another fold of skin on your body, don’t do it.

Consequently, who thought of this style? Not the people with the money to buy clothes. Because the people with the money to buy clothes, have muffin tops, that lap all over and can cause a stampede to change direction. The people with the money to buy clothes have a job, and hopefully sense enough, to not allow the muffin top to breathe air, not hidden by some kind of cloth or fabric. You can’t kill a muffin top by denying it fresh air, but a person can die from looking at too many muffin tops in one day that are not covered up.

I don’t want to sound snobby or arrogant. My rant is not about having a muffin top. I have a roll, that with the wrong pants, could easily be lapping out all over, disrupting traffic. My first complaint is about young women wearing pants that cause, an otherwise unnoticeable muffin top, to be lapping out all over, changing the gravitational pull. I mostly see these on waitresses and cashiers, of otherwise attractive women. This obsession with pants that are too small, bad fitting and lower than the equator, should be stopped at all costs. Is it so complicated to buy pants (and underwear, for that matter), that fit? How did this get so complicated? All that science and math we are forcing on these women, getting in the way of buying pants that fit?

Next, the muffin top routinely occurs on fat women wearing pants that are too small. GET BIGGER PANTS BECAUSE MUFFIN TOPS SHOULD NOT SEE THE LIGHT OF DAY. When you find a style of pants you like, it does not cost more to get the size that actually fits, unless I am unaware of this particular pricing scheme. If this pricing scheme is going on, call me. It sounds illegal.

Another thing I see is middle aged women wearing pants clearly made for a teenager. GROW UP AND GET PANTS THAT FIT. I didn’t say you had to agree with aging; you can fight it every step of the way. But don’t add insult to injury, by getting older and letting the muffin top dictate the impression (and the route taken) by passersby

Next, when you already have a uncontrolled muffin top with your pants, you shore up its stature by suturing your waist with a belt? When you have a rampant case of muffin top, what makes you think its going anywhere, and it needs a belt to stay put? How do get to that point in your brain, when you are deciding to put on that belt, that you decide "oh yes, this will look better"? Is it because you are already in that part of the flowchart of your brain, where muffin tops are fertile, and oxygen is not being generated by muffin top thoughts, which is impeding the ability of the brain to function at a higher level? Someone, help me understand.

So, what do to about muffin top disease? BUY PANTS THAT FIT. See no fancy courses with expensive tuition, and no secret decoders to buy. And..spread the word.

© Laurie TeWinkle, January 28, 2009.

Where has this Plan been for 7 of the last 8 years?

I like many Americans listened to House Minority Leader John Boehner this week, comment that the Republicans have not had any input into the terms of the Democratic stimulus package. Mr. Boehner and his Republican co-horts proudly stated they did not vote for the stimulus package. He also stated that the Republican stimulus plan was better, as it created 6.2 million jobs (twice as many as the Democratic plan), at half the cost.

Did you get that…their plan created twice as many more jobs than is projected for the Democratic stimulus, at half the cost?!?

Are you kidding me? Where has this idea been for 7 of the last 8 years?

Hiding on the back of Osama bin Laden?

Hanging out with Dick Cheney’s press secretary?

Lost with Amelia Earhart’s plane?

Buried with Jimmy Hoffa?

The Republicans have a plan…hmmm….a plan they say creates 6.2 million jobs… a plan they kept to themselves during 2008, while over 3 million Americans experienced up close and personally, what it feels like to lose a job, then your home?

This statement highlights, for the ---nth time, the degree to which the Republican party is out of touch. This statement highlights, that even though the Republican party has just experienced the largest voter backlash ever, they have not even considered a new direction. They got rode out of town on a rail, and a new direction has not even made a blip on their radar screen. This statement highlights, they still don’t have a clue about the average American.

By the way, I am embarrassed to say I am a registered Republican.

Laurie TeWinkle, © January 30, 2009